last day of the year

feeling much better today. especially when things started to go my way in the afternoon.

decided to leave the lab a little early since tomorrow i will be back to the lab for the whole day..yes a very special new year's day indeed, whereby i will be doing my work in the lab..anyway, dropped by Pyramid to have a little walk while waiting for my cousins for a ride home. new year's eve..should feel happy :) so went to have my favourite food in Pyramid, which is the crispy wrap. then passed by MPH, thinking that maybe i should check out whether there is any stock for 'Life of Pi', the book that i have wanted to buy these few weeks but cant find a copy. and when i went in, there was the book, lying on the shelf!! :D very happy indeed!!! really make my day.

so eventhough i still cant get the results that i want, yet again..i am very happy now :) last day of the year wasnt that bad after all.

happy new year to all! best wishes for the year to come...

very sick

home sick. very very sick...the main cause of this sickness is the lab. get stucked in the lab for too long, and keep getting no results. i need to get away for a while..i want to go home

super duper bad mood. just want to find ppl to chat. but some people are just so stupid. i care to start a conversation, but people just dont care to reply. i am not asking you to show any concern for me, just even answer my questions also so hard??? i know i m not some hot chick with a pretty face. so dats y i dont even deserve to be a friend? ya i m just stupid to pick the wrong person for a chat. and now another one does reply, but start to tell me lies. great. sadness turning into anger. thank you

i think i need some rest

Merry Christmas

time really flies. another 2 weeks have past since my last post. n today is christmas! cant help but feeling a bit excited, eventhough it is a stay-home-do-work day.

right after my last post, talking about all the longing for movies n break, the next day my uncle decided to have a family outing, dinner and movie :) we watched 'The Warlords' (投名状), starring Jet Li, Andy Lau and Takeshi Kaneshiro. it is one of the movies that i feel like watching these days but no time for it until the outing. the movie looks quite good in the trailer, and Takeshi Kaneshiro is one of the actors hahaha..the movie turned out to be good! better than what i expected. not just pure killings but more about human relationship, reality and life. the movie lasted for 2 hours, and when the movie ended, i realise my joints were kind of stucked..didnt really move much but just focus on the movie itself all the while hahaa..lucky i didnt leave the cinema with the comment 'nothing special...thank god at least got takeshi'. quite a good movie, worth watching :) and the outing was great. had a wonderful time. enjoyed the night

then..life moves on. nothing too special happen. for the week in the lab, things were not too good..still cant get the results that i am supposed to get. cracking my head thinking about what went wrong..one day finally found out that one of the volume of the solutions that i added in was wrong! was quite happy at first and thought that i really solved the problem, but then...when i rerun the test, NO RESULTS AGAIN.......god. i really dont know whats wrong. haih..going to try another method tomorrow. hopefully it works.

last friday (21/12/07) my office had an end-year bash, to thank everyone that has contributed something to the group. was really happy that one of my bosses, John, and his family made it for the event. always like to see them, such a happy family..had a good time catching up things with them. great night :)

then sunday (23/12/07)..went to the christmas event in the church with Eugene How. the event was great, like last year's. i always like their idea of holding a candle in the hand. the view of a sea of lights on the screen showing everyone in the hall just looked magnificant. next year will i still be joining their celebration? god knows..

then yesterday (24/12/07)..Christmas Eve! so decided to give myself a half-day break. went to Mid Valley and catched a movie, 'Alvin and the Chipmunks'. not good..eventhough i like the chipmunks, since i was still a small girl. the chipmunks were really cute...but the story line was just too normal. too much of singing. too bad..i thought i can have the feeling as the one i have for transformers, watching childhood favourite cartoons and enjoying it very very much, but sadly, i dont. the shopping mall was so crowded. suffocating..couldnt shop properly, and didnt really have time for it, because had to rush to go for a christmas pot-luck gathering at my lab mate's house. the gathering was quite fun..and i learned how to play mah jong hehehee..and we had a very lucky position with very good 'feng-shui', whereby anyone who sat there would win the game! all the winnings were from the people who sat there last night haha..interesting. anyway quite a nice outing.

thats all for the long long happier story..is life really better? hmmm maybe. i guess so..but i guess i will only have the greatest joy if things turn out well in the lab. my wish for this christmas..and also hope everyone that i care would be happy. Merry Christmas :)

need a break

have been very very busy these few weeks..was very sad and depressed because of the honours project. very stressed. until last week things started to turn out a little better, and finally managed to go for my long delayed sampling. but still made mistakes here and there when i processed my samples, because i was nervous and still not as confident as before. my confidence have been dashed quite severely and it is still slowing recovering..anyway finally get through the second sampling. really hope that things will go smooth in the lab. really need a lot of luck..wish me good luck..

this week finally not that busy in the lab..not that stressed. try to relax a little more. really feel like taking a break, going home, or just spend one day window shopping and watching a movie..i need a rest, after being so stressed for the past few weeks. will try to squeeze some time out..hopefully

honours year..really not as easy as i thought. i m not someone who thinks a lot, have a lot of interest in research. i am still blur and still make stupid mistakes in the lab..not very thoughtful. this is what makes me stressed. maybe i shouldnt have taken up the honours course..maybe. but no turning back anymore. so must continue on. no matter what, still have to get through everything. so all i can do now is work harder. people can survive honours year, so can i. just work harder

these days really appreciate friends around me who try to help me one way or another, or just listen to me at times. thanks a lot!

thats all for now. hopefully i have some nice stories to share soon.

smooth sailing in the lab please..really hope so

i need some fun. i need a break. i want to go home...

envy

turning lazier each day...have work to do, but never really get down to it. have stories to blog about and pictures to put up, but no new posts lately too. i dont know what i am turning into..

my lab mate is a sweet loving bf. but of course not my bf la..today he was going to meet up with his gf in Seremban. he bought some nice donuts for her..from some nice donut shop in a shopping centre quite far in KL. then in the lab, he prepared nail polish remover for her, using his own solvents. well, the things he did may seem to be very small n simple, and you can go ahead and call me silly. but to me what he did were really sweet...nice bf. cant help but envy.

celebrated Marcella's birthday on Monday. she is one of my close friends in uni. this is one of my favourite pics for the night. will post up others another day

birthday girl is the one right next to me. may all her dreams come true :)

a fairy tale

watched the movie Stardust yesterday. lovely fairy tale...quite a nice storyline. nice effects. beautiful actress. handsome actor (who only appeared charming after some make-over in the movie hahaa). happy ending. nice soundtrack. worth watching. go watch

the soundtrack: Take That - Rule The World


i like the innocence in the movie. still believe in fairy tales..

a little joy

these 2 days had a little bit of fun..yesterday my lab mate suggested a waffle break, so we went for it. bought a new cd, 'Goodbye and Hello' by Tanya Chua (蔡健雅) :) havent really listened to it properly..hopefully it can make me playing it over and over again, none-stop..

today went back to the office. ya..it is a public holiday today, but i still went back to the office, because the lab is closed on public holidays, i cant sort my samples, so i should go back to the office and fulfill my working hours. felt really tired at the beginning of the day..these days have been taking public buses every morning, have to wake up quite early, didnt sleep well. today was just so blurry..but after meeting Jim Fong in the office, felt much much better. some chattings and catching up while doing our work..did make the day better. after our work, we decided to have dinner together in One Utama..spent another round of our hard earned money on food again hahaa. ya another bit of money is gone, but we had fun :) i guess thats the most important thing. if spending a little bit of money can bring some happiness to you, then why not?

to be happy is still one of the most important thing in life..

troubled

...by an old problem.

it gets worse lately, after i realised how bad my judgement can be. disappointing.

when can i get out of this? i hope the day will come soon

lost myself somehow. need to find my soul back. where is it?

a little bored

have been spending most of my time in the lab these days. finally can start sorting my invertebrate samples, but the microbiology work still gets into the way...have to repeat the process because i cant get any results. haih...i thought i can get it over fast and just concentrate on the invertebrate part, but no. hopefully next week i can have some results and get over with it

sorting the invertebrate samples..is not hard actually, basically you will just have to sit there, look under the microscope, search for those little insect larvae in the sample, pick them up and put them in another smaller bottle. but it is SO TEDIOUS..time consuming and tiring. imagine sitting in a place and searching for little things under microscope for hours! can chat..provided i have someone else in the lab, but actually no good because i will forget which part i have looked through and which part no hahaa. thank god i have a radio in the lab. can at least listen to something and make life a little more interesting hahaa

start to miss field trips..i have just had one on 17/10, but then getting stucked in the lab just making me feel like going out there somewhere again. start to think about the project trip 2 weeks ago (6/10 - 11/10), whereby those few days we were just working in the plantation from early morning until late evening..of course no easy job, but then at least we get to go to different places everyday, and occasionally can see some nice birds..and we did something called 'lamping' one night. we drove around in the plantation and shone light around to detect the animals present. animals' eyes would reflect the light, looking like some little lights, and thats we detect them by looking around for those little eyes. seriously very interesting and exciting haaha..it is really fun to be with these professional wildlife people, you can really learn a lot and see a lot of interesting things. too bad we can only join them for lamping for 1 night

some pictures of the trip..all of them are not my own photographs. i only bought my camera after the trip. next time i will have my own photos. yay!

first day of work. first site. testing the stream water with Jim Fong. she is my batchmate from Monash, working for Wild Asia too for now (photo taken by Yong)

towards the end of the first day. Yong, Jim Fong and me sampling in another river (photo taken by John, one of my bosses)

Yong going through the sample, looking for the tiny invertebrates, counting and identifying them. while Jim Fong recording down the data. i was the one collecting the samples since my identification skill is not as good as his

have a good smell at the sample :p (well of course not la hahaaa. just taking a closer look at the sample for the invertebrates)

caught a cat fish in one of the samples at that sampling site. quite a big one (photo taken by John)

dragonfly mating. saw them on our way out from a forest. the bottom one is the female (photo taken by Yong)

in that forest, i saw some peakcock fern too. really nice looking fern, the leaves are blue in some parts other than the normal green. this picture was not taken in that forest though. it was in taman negara (photo by Yong)

a black shouldered kite. one of the nice birds we saw in the plantation (photo by Yong)

the lovely common palm civet cat that we saw when we did lamping that night. it was hiding on one of the oil palm trees. so cute!! (photo by Dave, one of the bird watchers in our team)

we also saw a leopard cat. beautiful, isnt it? :) (photo by Dave)

closer look at the cat

our group photo, taken at the place we stayed. from left: Jim Fong, me, Dave, Yong, John and Kim Chye. Dave, John and Kim Chye are the professional bird watchers. John is also an ecologist. he knows almost everything! from birds to flowers to dragonflies..you name it. he is just amazing!

zz time. back to the lab tmr..

new camera!

lately my cousin's old Canon Ixus died...which is really quite inconvenient for me since i want to take pictures of my sampling site, and it is really a pain when i go for field trips because i cant take any pictures at all. so decided to get one, using some of my hard-earned money and the other part is sponsored by my father. went to the Canon Expo today, and bought it!

This is it: Canon PowerShot A570 IS



my actual target is actually an Ixus, since i have been using Ixus all this while. but then..mainly because of the price (which is a little cheaper than the Ixus 75 i wanted initially), and also the functions (since you can sort of 'play' and learn more as you can adjust those shuttle speed etc, but you cant do these with an Ixus), and the freebies (i got a backpack and a 2GB memory card), so i bought this...at first i was still a little worried about the camera, since it is obviously more complicated than just a simple Ixus. but to think about it now, i m happy, since i have my own camera :) hopefully i will fully understand everything one day hahaaa

saw Simon Yam (任达华) today..well he is not really my idol, but he is still a super star. so joined in the fun to have a closer look at him, asked for his autograph and took a picture with him. once he arrived, the camera flashes just couldnt stop!!! but he was really friendly, didnt see a moment of him rejecting any shots or refusing any request for autographs. it is of course undeniable that he is VERY GOOD LOOKING, eventhough he is not very young. show u the picture when i get it then

had quite a nice day with Eileen, who went to the Expo together with me. thanks for the day :)

have been sick for a few days..sorethroat and flu. haih..dont like flu because i cant sleep well when i have blocked nose, and flu is always tiring. let me get well please..

ending

the damselfly is dying...or maybe by now it is dead already.

yesterday when i came back from the field trip, it was still on the plant, moving slightly. this morning when i reached the lab, it wasnt on the plant anymore...feeling a little nervous, i started to look around, searching for it. not on the plants, not around the pots....i was about to give up the search when i finally saw it..it was lying on the floor, looking dead. i thought, oh god, times up..but as i put it on my palm, i realised it moved! not dead..kind of happy, but it was quite sad looking at it, not able to move much, most probably because it was too hungry. i cant do anything to help it...where can i get any insects to feed it?? i can only watch it ending its life slowly. how sad..

i left it on my table, and started my work. it didnt move at all for most of the day, not that i noticed. before i went home, i decided to put it on the petri dish cover that i have, and by then, it really didnt move anymore..as i was considering whether i should add in any alcohol to preserve it, it moved!. god! i nearly killed it..lucky i havent poured in the alcohol yet. but it was really quite sad looking at it, trying its best to move, maybe trying to escape thinking that we were hurting it, but it was just too weak to do anything..it would really be a miracle if it survives over the weekend

it is always sad to watch living things losing their life. i dont like it...or maybe i shouldnt have developed any feelings for it, and just treat it as a 'thing'..then maybe i wouldnt feel sad when it is gone. but i am a human..how can i not feeling anything?

surprise in the lab

yong brought back some dragonfly and damselfly larvae during the field trip last week. they were left in the lab when we were back to KL on last friday. over the long weekend, i had been wondering what would have happened to them, whether they would survive, since they had no food. today when i was back to the lab, i found that some of them actually survived, alive and kicking in the plastic jars..and when i moved one of the jars, something actually flew out of it! God!! i was really surprised! it was actually a damselfly..one of the damselfly larva had turned into an adult!! hahaa...really didnt expect this to happen. the damselfly looks really delicate, and it is white in colour. maybe it will change colour later on, which i am not sure. i remember seeing the same type of damselfly when i went to one of the sampling sites. one of them flew out when i disturbed the water grass in the stream.

so what happens to the damselfly? it is still in the lab hahaa..the owner decided to let it hang around in the lab. it is still alive and hiding on the plant in the lab when i left. hopefully tomorrow i will still see it alive in the lab. poor thing...struggling without food. i wonder how long more it can survive

this is how a damselfly looks like. damselflies look more or less like dragonfllies, but they have a slimmer body, more delicate-looking. damselflies have their wings closed up when they perch on somewhere, whereas dragonflies have their wings spreaded out when they perch. do have a good look at a dragonfly next time if you have never noticed this before

long weekend

which was not eally very long though. thought i would spend most of my time at home, resting after the tiring field trip, but i ended up being out on sunday and today.

on sunday eugene invited me to the church. have not been there for such a long time..last sem was quite caught up with assignments. then slowly didnt really visit there anymore. still felt the same warmth that i had before when i was there. saw some familiar faces. had a good time catching up with eugene too. enjoyed it

today went back to the office. the lab was closed due to public holiday, so decided to go back to the office to do some work. one of my batch mates, jim fong, is working in the same office as me now, so it isnt too boring or just about work when i m back to office. had quite a nice lunch, and then we decided to go for a movie after work. watched Lust, Caution (色，戒). quite a good movie, eventhough ya, there was only caution and not much of lust due to the censoring hahaha..quite a nice day. enjoyed the outing

have not been very happy these days. but these 2 days of outing really cheered me up. great :)

i guess i am just too kind to some people...no matter how much they make me angry, eventually i will still forgive them somehow. i will still be kind to them. am i stupid? most probably...i dont know

angry for nothing

back from the one-week field work. no easy job...but did have some fun. maybe will talk more about it another day. not today. i m very tired

tend to get even more emotional when i m very tired. if i m sad i will feel even more sad, if angry i will just feel like killing people. maybe it is just something not really worthwhile for me to be angry with, but still i just cant make myself to feel better. guess i m just too tired

there are a lot of things that i dont understand. maybe there is really no need to understand at all..maybe

i really need some sleep. good night

work

very busy...sampling after sampling, field trips non-stop..had one field trip last week which was purely just for fun, then 2 sampling trips this week (one on wednesday, another one on thursday), from tomorrow onwards until next thurday will have another field trip which is for work and hopefully i will enjoy it. i do enjoy field trips, but i realise it can be really tiring when the trips are just too close together. just feel so tired because of the consecurtive field trips on wed and thurs....just feel like having a good sleep. just dont feel like having any trips anymore..yet i do feel excited when i think about the trip tomorrow. like the idea of visiting new places, eventhough i will be going to oil palm plantations yet again..just hope that i will enjoy myself. to tell you the truth, i enjoy my trips eventhough they are tiring. ya i do..hope i will have fun for the trip tomorrow

guess i should just finish up my work as fast as i can and then sleep.....i am just SO TIRED....haih

one week break

last week's break was quite fun. initially just plan to stay at home, be a good girl, read up about the invertebrates, and just spend a day to meet up with my secondary school friends. but in the end not only meet up with them, but also made a trip to singapore and met quite a lot of people.. nice :)


ding ying. really glad to meet her again. had lunch, talk talk talk, dropped by her room (which is really so neat and clean) and got some beauty tips from her too hehee. just miss you after i came back from s'pore..how nice if i m in nus too. then maybe we can go running at night together, or try clubbing together, shopping together, maybe stay back in the lab together also...sigh. want to meet you again. must meet next time when i go over again :)

after meeting with ding ying, spent some time in my younger sister's room. if you by chance come across someone that looks really like me in nus/singapore, yes thats my sis, and she is not me. i actually have a friend who went up to her and asked, 'chien wen what are you doing here?' hahaaa..my god. but with her over there now, it will be much much easier for me to go singapore hehe. my mum would be really glad to have someone to go over and have a look on her. i would really love to go over again soon

around evening, met up with hwa chin and her younger sis for dinner. subway's cookies are really nice! at night we went to jia en's acapella concert. ding ying was there too. the next day hwa chin met up with me n jia en again for breakfast before i left singapore. laughed our head off over lame jokes while having nice breakfast hahaa..hopefully i can be back to singapore again soon


hwa chin :)

after singapore, i met up with some of my secondary school friends. have not met them for such a long long time..had lunch, shop shop shop, lots of chattings. great time. glad to see that everyone is still good in her own ways..

from left: wei yen, soo teng, lay ting and me. great outing :)

thats my one week break. didnt realy have lots of rest but had lots of fun. did a lot of shopping too hahaa..i enjoyed my break. i am happy

away

home for one week. will be back on sunday.. :)

take care

graduation

my lovely bear and my lovely cert



a little performance before the ceremony. they actually played Cannon..one of my favourites. thank you



during the ceremony

waiting for the glorious moment to be on stage

my father

my elder sis

my new friends in the lab. they are simply great :)

one of my seniors who helped me quite a lot

kim. one of my batchmates who has always been incredible to me

chloe. the sweetest girl in my batch

my dear and i. best wishes to you in Hong Kong..

yong. my graduated senior who turned up too

other batchmates..

there goes the once-in-a-lifetime event....

relaxing

still felt a little sad as the day started. i was supposed to be busy sampling at the plantation, but ended up in the lab becos the trip was cancelled. spent half a day in the lab, then met up with some friends for lunch. was kind of lazy to take the bus home, and i had nothing much to do if i m back early anyway, so decided to spend the afternoon in Pyramid and wait for my cousin for a ride home after his work

watched a movie, The Invasion. starring Nicole Kidman. it is about the invasion of an alien virus which would turn people to be unfeeling and emotionless, and the infection would only be effective after a sleep. to think about it, there is nothing too special about the story line. but i like the pace, fast and thrilling enough. this makes the movie really enjoyable. didnt regret choosing this movie :)

bought another new top. actually i just bought one last saturday, this is the second one within less than one week hehe..i have long wanted to try something more girlish, but always cant find one which can catch my attention, until today. eventhough it is a bit more girlish, but it is still simple in a way. hopefully it looks ok. i like it

havent been having such a carefree afternoon for quite some time. enjoyed the afternoon :)

S.H.E feat Fahrenheit - xie xie ni de wen rou (谢谢你的温柔)


不知道 不明了 不想要 为什么 我的心
明明是想靠近 却孤单到黎明

cancelled

the sampling tomorrow is cancelled :( heavy rain caused the river to overflow on sunday and the estate was flooded. today one of my bosses went there to have a look and told me that we couldnt even have access to some of the sites. so no point going anymore. cant help but feeling quite sad. my heart just sank when i received the flooding news on monday. thought at least can still carry on with the water sampling part but cant. haih...this is the third time we are postponing the trip. i really start to wonder whether we are really going to do it. what to do...will just have to wait then. hopefully i can do the water sampling part some day this month, before i do the invertebrate samping in October. OCTOBER..so far away. oh god..just hope that by then the condition will be favourable for me

suddenly i am so free for the next few days. or maybe weeks. movies?? go back to the office?? float around in the lab?? no idea..see how things go

how do you feel when you notice that some friendships are turning bad? as in...not as good as before. what will you do? the distance is getting bigger and bigger, and it is getting harder to start conversations. friendship is a two-way thing. if it is only one way all the time, i guess some day the friendship will turn bad too no matter what. because it is tiring to be one way all the time. how to save such friendships? i dont know. do you?

not ready

not in the mood to blog these days. no fraser's hill for me after all..because the car couldnt fit me. felt quite dissapointed when i was told that i had to stay back, home alone. i mean...give me hope and then dash it?? how would you feel if i am the one who do this to you?? dont ask me at the first place then! dont ever give me nice hope, and then destroy it. DONT EVER DO THIS

sorry..started off grumbling. these days...i guess i m kind of worried about next week's sampling trip. i mean not really about the trip itself, but more for the microbiology part. i m worried that i might miss out any preparations that i have to do. i have spent a few weeks in the lab, but still..you need time to learn good skills and good lab preparation knowledge. eventhough i have been guided, sometimes i still tend to forget things, or dont do things the way they should be done. i guess worry doesnt help much. should just start to think thoroughly and get things ready next week once i m back to the lab. never feel stressed because of field trips hahaa..this is the first time. who asks me to take it as my honours project? if not the microbiology part wont even exist..anyway, things will be fine. everything will be fine in the end

friday stayed at home. today went out and had a bit of fun. watched a movie..Secret (不能说的秘密). the one directed by jay chou, starring jay chou too. quite a nice movie, but still felt a bit weird, because of the sudden twist of the story. but it is the twist that makes the movie not just a normal cliched love story. anyway, enjoyed the movie. spent quite a bit of money today..but didnt bring much happiness to me too. haih..

thats all for now...hows things at your end?

Jay Chou - Secret (不能说的秘密)

或许命运的签
只让我们遇见
只让我们相恋

这一季的秋天

飘落后才发现
这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡

alive

havent been blogging for some time. had been occupied with work and also the poster for my project. finally completed the poster yesterday, and the presentation will be on thursday. kind of nervous..will get through it somehow anyway. should be fine. i hope..

quite like my job..because of the field work part. once in a while i will have to go to the plantation in Port Dickson, away from the city, the cars, the buildings. be with the nature for a while. well it is true that other than oil palm trees, there are just still more of oil palm trees. nothing much. but i like the clear blue sky, and the peacefulness in the estate. just like to be away in the wild for a while. next week will be my first sampling. hope it will go well :)

hope the movie plan tomorrow will work. has been really quite some time since the last movie i watched, which was...the nightmare detective? just hope tomorrow i can catch the movie. have another movie in mind for thursday, after the presentation. yes desperate for some fun..need some rest and fun

might be going to Fraser's Hill on friday and saturday...but..just feel like staying at home. or maybe i should go and have some fresh air, and also some nice scenery. will decide when time comes

life is unpredictable. and i hate it at times. hate it

thoughts

these 2 days have not been feeling very happy. angry. but due to different things. i start to wonder, why do i end up doing honours? i have not really planned for this. in fact, i have never wanted to do it. my initial plan all this while was, to finish my degree and go out there, find a job, make money, and start to do whatever in life that i want to do, get whatever in life that i want to get. i have only planted the seed by applying for the course. and see now how the seed has grown. to study and work at the same time, eventhough just doing a part time job, is not easy. i dont have a car, thus i have to travel around by taking bus. 7 buses in a day is no fun. and to decide on when to go back to the office and when to be back to uni is another headache. things just dont go as i plan at times..just hate it. and now...start to taste how cruel life can be. when you are still new, means you will have to learn, have to tolerate when people just dont give you nice replies, cannot grumble because you are still no good, have to TOLERATE no matter what. this thing is very common in working places, is also not very rare in a campus, eventhough i m still a student. i should stop being so naive, thinking that why people have to behave like that. THIS IS LIFE. FACE IT.

i should stop grumbling. no point. there is no turning back. when challenge comes, you take it and deal with it. thats it.

today dropped by a boutique when i went to save my nike shoes. wanted to buy a new pair, but just cant make myself to take out rm200 for a new pair. anyway, saw a short dress which looks quite nice, and quite cheap, less than rm60. and this makes me thinking about Monash Ball hahaa. if i am going this year, this dress will come in handy. but this sem is different, most of my friends have left uni, no organiser, and no point going too. dont think i will go. time really flies, doesnt it? last year there was this girl who sang Kiss Me towards the end of the ball. memories are still so fresh. sometimes just hate it. why cant i forget things? why am i able to remember things so well??? whats the point???

sorry..nothing seems to sound nice in this post. but i have to vent it out. not happy means not happy. no need to hide. dont like to hide.

lonely

project is progressing bit by bit, which really makes me happy when i think about it. did a trial test for the water samples that i collected on last sunday, and saw the results today. did get some positive results :) and the research asistant that guides me said that my agar plate looked quite nice. praises on work from people who are quite professional already in the same work do sound good, dont they? just hope things continue to go well..

i guess now i can quite understand why people say research life is boring. the amount of people we meet in the lab area is really small, and for me i guess i can be considered more fortunate, since i have 2 labs to move around, eventhough it still doesnt make much difference. at least i dont have to get stucked in the same lab everyday. i will be in lab 3 when i am doing my microbiology work, if not i will be in lab 5, which is where i will be doing my environmental part, the invertebrates part. lab 3 is quite lively, 3 research assistants and 3 honours students including me. all girls. and they keep playing stephanie sun's songs until they get stucked in my head hahaha. i prefer a lab without music though, but it is not my lab, so i should just get used to it. as for lab 5, there are only 3 of us using the lab, 2 pre-master course students and me. quite like the lab because there is not much people to deal with but just 3 of us, and i can officially claim a place there and stay there as long as i want. can use and touch anything as i wish. just like my own lab. the 2 guys in my lab are quite nice, especially tse yuen. he has been in the lab for some time, so he knows more than i do. has been helping me when i have questions and very nice to chat with. glad to have him in the lab. but life gets really boring when i am the only one in the lab, like today. so quiet and liveless hahaa..except the sound of the bubbles coming out from the aquarium containing the water cockcroaches. and we have another smaller aquarium now with some apple snails and another bug which i am not sure what it is called from the tin mine lake they had field trip on last saturday. very cute little bug, still alive and can swim quite fast in the water. i like the green plants by the window, which show another sign of life in the lab. hope they wont die hahaa..

sometimes just feel a bit too quiet in the lab area. and when people that you meet in the lab dont appear you feel even worse..more quiet than ever. dont have much people to share things with. guess after i go for my sampling, i wont feel bored and lonely anymore. i will be too busy dealing with the samples. miss the time when we go for lectures, where we will meet people everyday, chat with the closer ones everyday, moving from one venue to the other, meeting more people. i have long lost my addiction on msn i guess...last time used to engage in daily chattings with people, but now..most of the people are very busy, and most of the time i am just too lazy to think of anything to say. dont feel like starting conversations. dont feel like choosing people to start chatting. i am tired to care too much anymore i guess, especially when the effort doesnt seem to pay off. tired to drive on a one-way street

i have a feeling that i am somehow stucked in a space, never really move on to the new phase. technically i didnt really have a very good rest since i finished my last semester 2 months ago. just kept worrying about getting a job, when i finally secure a part time job, it is time to start my honours too. feel like going home and rest for a while, and come back here start anew feeling fresh. when will i have the chance to go back? maybe i should think less and concentrate more

tanah merah trip. today

the trip to Tanah Merah plantation on saturday was quite a nice one. quite an enjoyable day. there were 5 of us going there together: Mr John, the advisor from Wild Asia who brought his wife and his 5-year-old son along; James, the intern from UK and me. Mr John and James were involved in the eco-mating of a part of the eroded river bank in the plantation, while i was there to check out the potential sampling sites


in Mr John's car. around 7am plus. a lovely cloud which doesnt really look very lovely here



the road outside the staying place for Wild Asia people



loading the eco-mats and the blocks to the truck to be transported to the working site. the mats are made out of fibers of unwanted parts of a oil palm fruits, and they can attached to the eroded river bank better than the plastic covers that normally people use to cover the side of the high ways when landslides occur



from left: Mr John's son, Mr John, one of the people who are in charge of the eco-mating and Mr John's wife.


James, the intern from UK

a potential sampling site at Sungai Janging. the river looks yellowish but actually it is just the colour of the sediments which are sand in the river. the water is actually quite clear

at the middle of the river. this was where me and Mr John' s son, Bryn, spent some time 'sampling' while his dad was busy at work somewhere near the front part of the river. the little boy brought along his little net and a little box to catch the larvae, small fish, little shrimps in the river, just like what i am going to do during my own sampling. believe me, this 5-year-old boy's sampling skill is really very impressive. he managed to catch quite a number of things, just by using a little net. and he is just 5 years old!!!

little Bryn showing me some fruit that he found on a plant.

they have plenty of chicken shit flowers at the site

another potential sampling site somewhere in the middle of the plantation. the river still looks quite ok, flowing with clear water

downstream of the above site. the yellow car over there is Mr John's car

this is our so called Pig River. it got its name because of the dead pig found in the river some time ago when Mr JOhn checked out the plantation. yes. it is very yucky-looking and it is giving out a very 'nice' smell. i actually went down there, just by the river to collect some water samples. the soil which i stepped on was very soft, and i thought it was just normal mangrove soil. but to my surprise, the 'soil' which i stepped on was actually BLACK GREASE. eeewwwwwww...

then the last stop was the reservoir. it started to rain when we reached there. in fact at the very beginning at the first river site it had already started to rain..the water looked ok from far. but when you are by the reservoir, you will know that actually does not seem to be as clean as it appears to be..there are a layer of something at the surface of the reservoir. just doesnt look clean.

after the eco-mating was finally done, we went to Port Dickson town in search of lunch. in the end we found this chinese restaurant and had quite a nice meal there..thanks to Bryn, we had crab other than a fish, some pork and a vege. then me and Mr John's family headed back home, while Mr John and James stayed on for the eco-mating work. quite a fun trip...didnt feel like working, more like just a trip for enjoyment. nice

as for today...the most interesting thing is that, my lecturer actually brought in some water cockcroaches and currently rearing them in the lab!!! haahaha. water cockcroaches from the river in FRIM. she wants to know about their eating habits and whether they swim in water. one of them is seriously very big hahaa. hopefully wont see them anywhere outside the tank containing them :p

starting off

have been really busy and tired these few days. getting my materials ready for my project, meeting my lecturers almost everyday to discuss and clarify things with them, learning the protocol for the microbiology part of the project which i will perform after i do my sampling, learning more about my part time work for the company that offers me this project...ya. walking around so much in uni until people start to wonder why i am so free since they can just bump into me here and there haha. the thing is i am walking around to settle things, not touring around just for fun. and this is the part which makes me really tired. by the end of the day, after i reach home around 8pm plus together with my cousin, all i want to do is to have my dinner and then sleep. very tired..no doubt after a few weeks of free life, this sudden start of busy life again is taxing. glad that most of the things are quite ready now, except some details here and there, and also have to keep learning. just hope things will go well

yesterday i went to the office of the company to discuss about the details of the trip to the plantation that we are going to make this weekend. guess how many buses i took yesterday?? 2 to get to the office which is in Sri Hartamas, 3 to get back to uni which is in Sunway, then another 2 to go home after uni. total: 7 buses, for one whole day. 7 !!! have never done this before, yesterday was the first time hahaa..so many. but thank god the waiting time spent for the buses was still quite acceptable. and also didnt spend much money on them, thanks to the bus fee system of one of the bus company, whereby you buy one ticket and it can be used for any other buses of the same type that you take on the same day. so, you can just pay once and take as many buses as you like, as long as they are the same type. but it was really tiring

really glad that i will be going for a field trip soon. need to rest and have some fun, eventhough i know going there means working. will be going to the oil palm plantation in Port Dickson tomorrow. initially i am supposed to leave this evening, and then will spend the next 4 days there. but because of some situations concerning myself, now the plan has to change and i will only be going there tomorrow and be back tomorrow. haihhh...but all these are done becos of a good intention. feel quite guilty but cant help. feel quite sorry for all the trouble that i have caused. well anyway just hope the trip will be fun, and when i am back i will be one happy girl again, like i always do after field trips :) hope everything will go well tomorrow

transition blues

watched a new japanese drama on tv yesterday and they have this song that i am playing here as the ending theme song. sounds quite nice. you can check here for the translation of the lyrics, if you want to know what he is singing about..

kind of worried about my project..just in the transition period for the new studying phase i guess. need a bit more time before i can get out of the think-too-much state. should just concentrate on my readings

things are going to be fine. i will be fine

great news

going to do my honours while doing the project as a job. the company is going to take me in as a part time research assistant and pay me a monthly salary..at the same time, i will be working for my honours year. the project will determine whether i will end up as a first class student or worse..

it is the best news so far for these few weeks :) eventhough they didnt really agree to sponsor me much..

but to think about it...is it really good to do honours? can i really write a thesis and present it nicely??....well i will have to, right? hahaha...if not i will waste all those money..

cant believe that things really turn out like the way i really hope it can. doing an honours plus doing a project that i am interested in..at first i thought i will have to deal with the rats, which i know i cant even inject them hahhaa. now things just seem ok :)

still a great thing for me anyway :) hopefully i will get the agreement soon and start my work soon. tomorrow will go do all those enrolment thingy. cant wait for tomorrow to come. i am just excited! :D

another round of waiting

a little magic done by my dear friend Ding Ying that managed to bring a smile on me today...

before the magic:

after the magic:

thanks!! :D

while i was browsing through deviant art in the afternoon, came across this painting:

Funguys by Wolfess-fuzzpot

and it reminds me of my own fungi that i drew some time ago...

had the urge to post up the picture there too...hahaa. the painting by Wolfess-fuzzpot is done using water colour and HB pencil. mine is coloured pencils. different materials, different feel too. so cant really compare i guess. and i know it is not easy to use water colour and produce such tones on the pictures, eventhough the effect may make it look as if it is easy to produce. i think the actually piece of picture by Wolfess-fuzzpot should look more stunning..

the start of the week marked the start of another round of waiting for replies about the project. mood has not been very good these days, kind of down..plus the aimless waiting again..just makes things worse i guess hahaa. well cant do much about it right...so just try to keep myself busy loh. today i cleared up my laptop, i should have more space n thus faster speed once i get those files out of my com. going to burn them out. will go out n have some air tomorrow.

please give me some replies!!! god...i hate waiting :(